Today is going to be a long day

This weekend started off ok. I went to Michael's and Joanns to see if i could get the creative juices flowing for a self promo thing to send to some of the design firms around town.

Saturday I did some knitting on the Haiku sweater that I'm making for my cousin's little girl. I got pretty far. So I'm feeling good about that.

Then yesterday... my boyfriend hadn't been himself lately. And he had said that when he gets like this he just wants to hang out at home and not doing anything or talk to anyone. I completely understood, being an only child too. Well it turns out it was more than that. He wanted to break up. It kinda came from out of nowhere. The part that hurts the most is that I had to drive over to his house, and I was the one to say "So what are you saying, do you want to break up?" What angers me the most about this is that I basically did his breaking up for him. I still care deeply for him. We got along great which is where I don't understand where all this came from. It seems like everything was fine and then after New Years, something happened. And I don't know what it was. He said he didn't see us together for the long term. No reason why he didn't see us together for the long term. I'm just tired of this. The last three boyfriends I've had, have pretty much destroyed my will to do much of anything. It hurts to breathe. I know in time I'll get over it. I've gotten over much worse. I'm just tired of getting my heart broken by guys who can't be honest with themselves and me. And guys who make me do their dirty work. I can't take much more of this.