Nothing new to report

It took me over and hour to get home last night. Then when I got home my ex had dropped off the rest of my things. I don't know what I was thinking. Perhaps a letter explaining how sorry he was. Or perhaps that he's changed his mind. I don't know. Again, that's something that happens in a movie. Not in my life. All that was a bit hard to take, so I decided to go swimming. Well when I got to the pool the pool was closed because their HVAC system had shut down or something strange. And by this point it's now pouring down rain. So I get in the car and drive over to Storables to get the rest of the boxes for me to put my dvds and cds in. By the time I got home it was 8. So I organized my cds and dvds and pretty much went to bed. I'm still having problems sleeping. I'm trying not to continue to take Tylenol PM but last night was difficult.
It's weird, I'm in this strange space. I just keep picturing things a couple months from now. When I run into him. Half that time I picture it where he regrets everything and wants to get back together and the other half the time I picture running into him with someone else. Doing all the things we used to do. And it kills me.
I'm trying to keep a routine going in the hopes that will help me get focused. I do the same thing every morning. I get up. I make my bed. I get ready for work. I grab my coffee. And I head to work. When I come home, I grab the mail. I try to eat. I pick up my mess. ˆI watch TV. And I go to bed. And every other day I try to work swimming in there.
I just want some sort of focus back in my life.